It's Where I Am with Zandra Polard

Unknown Speaker 0:00
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Zandra Polard 0:50
Good morning, Las Vegas, it's Zondra polearm. It's where I am. Hey, I should say it Zondra and Dr. G, because Dr. G is in the building. He is my co host for today. And if you missed the show last week, he is the new guest host of it's where I am starting in 2024. So make sure you're tuning in every week at 730. And he will bring you lots of resources and information dealing with mental health and wellness. So thank you again for being here.

Unknown Speaker 1:26
Absolutely. It's it's a privilege Zondra for me to be here and to become more formally involved as a team member on it's where I am. And to support you and and supporting our community. Oh, yeah. Thank you. Oh, absolutely.

Zandra Polard 1:42
Well, you're one of my favorite guests. I mean, you've been on several times, you know, and then I've always used you as a resource. You know, if there were questions or something that I didn't know, because I am not a mental health professional. This is just my passion project. So often I would, you know, call you and ask you about, you know, different things that are going on advice. And also you have helped me with quite a few guests to come on as well.

Unknown Speaker 2:10
Well, you know, you're a community partner. And that's how you and I initially were introduced to each other, yes, from mutual colleagues. And since then our relationship has blossomed throughout the years. And we've had opportunities to work together professionally on your show, and, and to connect outside of it's where I am to support community members and linking them to different resources. And you've always inspired me Zondra and just being an advocate for mental health and just helping I believe, D stigmatize ideas that some people hold about accessing care or accessing services. A lot of people when we talk about mental health, emotional health, they're maybe compromised or concerned about accessing care because of how others may view them. Sure. And so, you know, you've always been a huge proponent, though, to make accessing mental health services normal for for all of us. And so, you know, how could I not become a huge support Sandra Bullock?

Zandra Polard 3:18
Oh, well, thank you. Thank you What is so true, because, again, it is my passion project. And I found that it is super important to normalize the conversation. And that's why I do it, y'all. So anyway, you are involved with grief and loss counseling as well. Yes. So I know you did a symposium recently. I did. Can you give us some information to help us during this holiday season? You know, a lot of us have lost loved ones. And we miss them. So what do we do? But I'm thinking we should probably celebrate them at this time. Right?

Unknown Speaker 3:57
Yeah, I think for each one of us how we move forward and managing our grief and loss is different. And and and I'm going to throw myself into this conversation because this year I lost my mom on Father's Day. Oh, wow. And so this is the first of everything for me experiencing something new without her being in my life. Oh, wow. And so the sixth part of the grieving process, if you will, and the model that clinicians mental health providers go to to help individuals manage grief and loss is creating new meaning. So I'm very much in that stage of creating and looking at past

Zandra Polard 4:48
emotional because you're getting a little Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 4:53
And and, you know, creating new traditions without having my mom around. Let's still being able Well to identify ways that are positive for me to hold her in mind and to celebrate her spirit, and what she's meant to all of us for, for, you know, such a long time.

Zandra Polard 5:11
Wow. Okay. So how many siblings do you have?

Unknown Speaker 5:14
So I'm an only child. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's just me. And so the last gift that my mom gave to me and her husband this year, was 13 hours of us being together as a family. Just being with her and holding her hand before she passed away.

Zandra Polard 5:35
Oh, wow, that's tough. Yeah, I'm so sorry.

Unknown Speaker 5:39
And, you know, I mean, death is part of living. Yeah. And it's just part of our human existence. And as much

Zandra Polard 5:48
as we think we'll be prepared for it, because it sounds like you knew you had that time. But it's just, you know, even if you're prepared, or you think you're prepared, you're not prepared. Absolutely.

Unknown Speaker 6:00
And, and so that's one, something that I love about us. Zondra is because you really go in and highlight the reality of life. And for those of us that may have a parent or a loved one, maybe in assisted living, or in hospice. And so, you know, there's a trajectory, we think that when someone goes into hospice, that, you know, there's a certain amount of time that they may live before they pass on. And so we have that time to maybe emotionally and mentally prepare for our loved one to pass on. But you call it out. I mean, as much as we think we're ready, and prepared to say goodbye to our loved one. There's nothing that we can really do to prepare us in managing that sense of loss and those emotions. And being ready to say goodbye, right?

Zandra Polard 7:02
Well, you know, I've noticed, because I lost a loved one. My grandmother in a hospice, and I feel prepared, you know, but then there's those times where feelings and emotions come up. And it's like, where did that come from? United me. So I try to look at it as a visit. You know, I feel like maybe it's her presence. Yes. You know, and I try to take that and, like you said, change the way I'm feeling to mean something else. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 7:37
So healthy and, and can be so powerful for the individual when we're capable of being able to do that. Because I feel like all of us will get triggered.

Zandra Polard 7:51
There you go. That's the word at

Unknown Speaker 7:53
times when we least expect to feel something right. And then we get this surge of emotions and become overwhelmed. And we're maybe in line cashing out at the grocery store, or Yeah, we might be in the bank, at the at the teller and we just all of a sudden get overwhelmed by these feelings. And, and we're putting in a place of Oh, like, how do I mask this? How do I manage these intense feelings, where I'm in a store or some place where maybe we wouldn't express this level of emotion, or present ourselves in a certain way that might look a little weird or odd. And we might feel really uncomfortable. And so I feel like though we then are maybe shaming ourselves to a certain point to not allow ourselves oh, yeah, you got to put that mask on. That's right. Yeah. And not really then go in deep and just acknowledged the hurt and the sense of loss that we may be feeling at that time. And, and

Zandra Polard 9:01
then what about those who do and then you have the society looking at them, like what's wrong with them over there? But you know, that's why there's this huge reminder I'm about to give you which is to give grace to others give grace because you never know what someone else is going through.

Unknown Speaker 9:17
Yeah, that's such a powerful statement Xander. Because just giving somebody a smile, and and being kind to someone because we just don't know, right, what anybody is going through and, and like what I just shared with you about losing my mom earlier this year on Father's Day. And that's something you know, it's kind of close to home, but it's certainly surfacing for me and it's something that I'm exploring and going through. And it's hard for many of us, I think, to reach out and ask for a helping hand or support or just to be with somebody and to have somebody just be emotionally attune and present with what it Is that that other person may be experiencing due to this sense of loss? And, you know, I think hopefully, when people listen to this conversation, that they will feel more open to reaching out to friends, family, people that support them when they're having a hard time and they need a little help. Because I think that's so hard for all of us is to get over that stuff. Is it ego? Is it pride? Is it stigma? I don't know. But to get past that, in order for us to ask for help, and, and just to be with somebody?

Zandra Polard 10:39
And when you do it with a nice hot cocoa, or some tea, don't pull out the liquor?

Unknown Speaker 10:46
Yeah, probably the liquors not good. Because that's gonna compound how we're feeling, right? It's

Zandra Polard 10:52
gonna make you more depressed,

Unknown Speaker 10:53
it is yes. And, you know, it's going to have us get into a space where maybe we're having a hard time bringing ourselves up from and so we don't want to participate in activities that might bring us down further.

Zandra Polard 11:09
Well, you know, I can always tell when someone's been drinking a little bit too much, because then they start crying, like out the blue, they'll just start crying. I'm like, cousin. I'm not gonna say your name. But why are you crying right now? I think you had a few too many drinks yesterday. And, you know, we need to deal with whatever it is you are suppressing. Yeah, because

Unknown Speaker 11:27
it really brings up those underlying feelings. And, and then the feelings, you know, generate thoughts and memories. And it just becomes this, this spiral that we get stuck in. It's like a feedback loop that, you know, keeps spinning and spinning, sort of like a hamster on a hamster wheel. But then how do we stop it though? Right. That's the piece I think that a lot of people have a challenging time with.

Zandra Polard 11:52
Yeah. Yeah, well, hey, for those who have lost loved ones, and you have to deal with that loss at this time, I encourage you to reach out to friends and family. You know, and if you need to speak to a professional, you can always contact with a content. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 12:10
absolutely. So so, you know, there's so many community resources available to support individuals, all year long, but also at this time of year, where, you know, it may it may increase or escalate feelings in us because it's the holiday time, right. And, and so I would say never be shy to reach out to the resources within your community. And if anyone ever feels like, they're in a place of unbalanced, where potentially they feel like they may harm themselves, you know, call 911. And, and don't be shy about accessing, you know, resources. One 800 273

Zandra Polard 12:51
Talk is one, okay, you can always go to my website, it's where I am.com there are resources there. And then also, great mind counseling and Wellness Center.

Unknown Speaker 13:04
Absolutely. So so we're a local mental health agency here. And, you know, we're really not obligated where we're committed, rather, okay to wanting to just be a resource to people in the community that really need help. And and so, you know, it's individuals that are really maybe at their last end, if you will, that decide that they're ready to make change and want to access some help. And those are the individuals that at great minds counseling and Wellness Center, we have the privilege of providing clinical services to now

Zandra Polard 13:45
you know, you were here last week, and you know, we did not do, we did not give a phone number. We didn't give a phone number out or nothing. So let's do that today. What is the phone number for great mind counseling and wellness centers? Xandra.

Unknown Speaker 14:03
You know, every time you bring me on the show, you know, you asked me such challenging questions. And and one of the most challenging question is, what is the telephone number? Access? And I'm gonna get that for you right now. Okay, so give me one moment.

Zandra Polard 14:20
All right, no problem. So as we're waiting, you guys may want to pull out pen and paper, do it the old fashioned way, or get your phone ready, so that you can, you know, tap in that phone number and look up the website as well. So while you're looking at up, yes, make sure you give the website as well. All right, yeah. So we can check you out online. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 14:43
Okay. So the number to access live person at great minds, and to have an opportunity to ask questions and get more information about the services that great minds counseling and Wellness Center provides bytes is area code 702-208-2194. And again, that's Area code 702-208-2194. And thank you so much lander for allowing this opportunity for great minds to provide a contact number.

Zandra Polard 15:19
Oh, yeah, absolutely. And then is there a website as well?

Unknown Speaker 15:22
Yeah, we also have a website. And that is, let me get that for you right now. Okay, so it is great. hyphen, mind, hyphen, counselling, hyphen, wellness. And that will bring you to great minds counseling and Wellness Center,

Zandra Polard 15:47
or just go to my website. It's where I am.com. I will post that website there where you can just click on it in, you'll get right there. Okay. So I

Unknown Speaker 15:57
know Dr. G, sometimes I make things a little bit more challenging than I have to Oh, it's

Zandra Polard 16:01
all good to have you here. Hey, it's Dr. G. Here. It's where I am, we are continuing the conversation about grief and loss. And also we want to tap on this holiday season in the stress of in my goodness, it is busy out there. I passed by a shopping center. And every space was filled by and I was like, I'm so glad for the first time. I did all my shopping online. I mean, it alleviated so much stress. I did everything at like 130 in the morning, everybody done? Wow. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 16:41
I'm impressed. It was great. You know, online shopping is is really becoming such a consistent trend with with buyers because it's so easy. Yeah. You know, stress free. And look what you did it you did it, you decided 1:30am In the morning, you're up you decided, okay, this is the time I'm going to

Zandra Polard 17:01
sleep, I was neurotic. Well, I might as well do some shot. Well, and

Unknown Speaker 17:07
I think for us Zondra you decrease the level of stress that's associated with holiday shopping, and and look at driving to the studio this evening, you know, it all seeing all the cars and everybody out on the road, right, but he's shopping all, you know, last minute at the same time. And the level of stress, though, that that alone creates for all of us is is a lot to manage. And then you're you know, driving to the studio to get on the air. You're managing other responsibilities. Yeah, throughout the day. And we're all wearing these different hats. And so we're compounding though, the on top of just the what we normally have as as everyday stress, you know, additional things that that, you know, really do impact our mental and emotional health and our well being. And so it's I think identifying ways in which we can decrease those stressors so that they don't have such a huge impact on how we regulate ourselves throughout the

Zandra Polard 18:17
day. And also, you know, I love Kwanzaa. I was saying a few weeks ago, that I've never done it, officially, but I'm moving towards it. And I love the celebration of each day. I love that. The focus isn't just chopping and giving gifts, you know? So I encourage you all if you have not started your Kwanzaa venture, give it a try. You might like it. Okay,

Unknown Speaker 18:50
I love it. Well, you know, and kind of the sense that I got from that Sondra is with thanksgiving. For me, it's about just having the opportunity to be around loved ones. So people that I value in my life, and spending time with. And that's kind of the feeling that I got as I listened to you talk about Kwanzaa is is because it's not about buying gifts. It's it's about coming together, celebrating each other. Right?

Zandra Polard 19:17
It's that it's community. It's a lot. I mean, I'm not the Kwanzaa specialist, you know, I'm still learning and I'm slowly moving towards it. So I do start with about, I think is hub Arrigoni is what you say, on the first day, out of the seven days, every morning or every day. That's how you greet you know, whomever. And then they give their response. And then you their response is to tell you the day of Kwanzaa it is. So whether it's moja or boomanji or whatever. radius that will be the response. So it's cool. It's really cool. It's a lot. It's seven days. So it's a lot, but that's cool. Well, you

Unknown Speaker 20:08
know, I'm interested in learning more about Kwanzaa from you, and not

Zandra Polard 20:13
just me, but part of what you do is to be culturally competent. Yes. Right. Yeah. So absolutely. Whether you are an African American or not, it is still good to know how others celebrate. So that you can be of great help to them. Right?

Unknown Speaker 20:29
Absolutely. And I'm so Zondra You're always so spot on. And like this, is you always impressing me? Because it's on air. Now, that's not true. She's Xander Polo is a classy woman. But you said the word culturally competent? Yes. And that's something that is very dear to my heart, and, and to how we provide clinical services at great minds. Yes. You know, it's so important for all of us to be invested, and to want to make the effort to get to learn about the person that is sitting next to us or in front of us. And it is, so we can better understand the individual or the family's needs. And from a professional perspective, it assists us in linking recommending appropriate resources that could most effectively help out an individual or family. But also in my personal life, those are I've found that it has helped me to be a better friend, Oh, yeah. And to communicate better, and understand people's perceptions of myself and how I may come across, or how I may communicate. So that we can have a more intimate relationship with one another. And we're, we're really understanding each other, because I think in communication, and depending upon where we grew up, and just speaking about the United States, you know, I come from the Northeast Corridor, I can hear the state of Massachusetts, and and we talk funny, you know, we just do, and there's different cultural norms that are specific to the northeast corridor, and how we process communication nonverbal communication. And, and so I've needed to be more attune and, and receptive to receiving feedback, and maybe how I may come across. Yeah, sure. Because I may come across and be received or perceived in a manner that is not my intention. Right. And, and so, you know, just being mindful of going back to this idea of cultural competency, you know, that's something that I hold highly and that all my team members at great minds. You know, that's something that we work on right

Zandra Polard 23:08
now. Tell us what is your position there and great minds? And also, how long have you been in the mental health? Field? Yes.

Unknown Speaker 23:16
So Zondra loves to highlight my age, often.

Zandra Polard 23:22
I noticed your experience your wisdom?

Unknown Speaker 23:24
Well, I've been involved in the field of mental health for 24 years, yes. And I've really honestly have had the privilege of helping a lot of individuals and a lot of families and, and to be on that journey with so many people and to help individuals make sense out of things that have come across in their lives, so that they can move forward and be healthy and be happy and be safe. So at great mines counseling and Wellness Center, my role is clinical director and as of January one 2024, that will also my role will broaden to include public relations director.

Zandra Polard 24:08
Okay, so this will work very well for you being in this space.

Unknown Speaker 24:12
Absolutely. Okay. Absolutely. And, and, you know, Zondra I feel like I'm stepping into really big shoes that I need to fill as you take a little break and a little time off from it's where I am. But not just highlighting or showcasing great minds. I really hope to utilize this time while I'm in your shoes, you know, highlighting just other resources as well throughout the community, bringing in other speakers, you know, representing different resources, maybe even outside of mental health that though is applicable to helping our fellow neighbor living a higher quality life. Yeah. And so I I really look forward to you know, identifying, you know, different different resources that you know, I can hopefully present on it's where I am. Yeah,

Zandra Polard 25:09
well so that means you need to turn in out there 91.5 Jazz and more every Saturday at 7:30am for Zondra and Dr. G Yes soon. Dr. G. And also if you missed any portion of this broadcast, you know you can find it on all your major podcast platforms. And we will see you next week and on our way out. We're going to play a little tune for you. Let's get on with some Bruno Mars count on me

Unknown Speaker 25:48
if you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea to find you if you ever find yourself lost in the dark and you can't see

Unknown Speaker 26:04
I'll be there

Unknown Speaker 26:07
to guide you find out we all call to help our friends and you can count on me 123

Unknown Speaker 26:25
I'll be there and I know when I need it I can count

Unknown Speaker 26:34
432 and you'll be there cuz that's what friends are supposed to do

Unknown Speaker 26:53
if it's your turn today and you just can't fall asleep I sing the song aside you dip you ever forget how much you really meet me every day remind you Oh find out why we are called to help our friends. You get to three

Unknown Speaker 27:30
I'll be dead. And when I need it I can count on you. For

Unknown Speaker 27:40
three you'll be there because that's what friends are supposed to do

Unknown Speaker 27:58
always have my show now

Unknown Speaker 28:19
kick count on me

Unknown Speaker 28:23
to three I'll be

Unknown Speaker 28:27
and I know when I need it. I can count on you

Unknown Speaker 28:38
because that's what friends are supposed to do.

Unknown Speaker 28:49
You can count on make your sack and count

Transcribed by https://otter.ai